Yes

One reason yes is on my mind is from the Power of Intention Perpetual Flip Calendar based on Dr. Wayne W. Dyer’s book, The Power of Intention.  The entry was not for a recent date.  It was for August 6, the day displayed after my four-year-old daughter flipped the pages even though I told her "no" she could not play with mommy’s tablet.  The entry indicated that saying yes more frequently and almost completely eliminating no was basically saying yes to life. 

I am outnumbered by my children three to one.  Loads of requests come my way.  Sometimes I am overwhelmed by the number of times I say "no" in a day.  Stand in the bathroom sink to see in the mirror?  Go to Target in the fifteen minutes between piano lessons and soccer practice?  Sign up for another after school club even though we are already involved in student council and recycling club?  Go to bed without brushing teeth, again?  I do not wish to grant these requests to avoid the word "no" but want to use "yes" more.

Dictionary.com defines yes with several entries; three are listed. 

·         noun – an affirmative reply

·         verb (used with an object) – to give assent or approval to

·         interjection – a strong expression of joy, pleasure, or approval

I think Wayne Dyer makes a good point.  I recall the 2008 Jim Carrey movie, Yes Man.  The commitment to an affirmative reply to every question posed was hilarious.  Jim Carrey’s character could have harmed himself countless ways and married a foreign mail order bride, but ultimately he felt freed and happy.  As I attempt more affirmative replies, I feel that same twisted face Carrey showed as I force myself to allow things I might initially deny.  Can my daughter wear a flowered shirt with butterfly pants and rain boots?  Can my son use the computer to look up every Pokémon and print them all out?  Can my eldest use my favorite nail polish to paint her toenails?  Can they have an Icee that will color their teeth and tongues blue for the entire day?  Can we stay up past bedtime to watch an IBM computer play Jeopardy?   

Doling out assent does raise positive energy.  But, yes is a tricky word.  It must be handled carefully so as not to overextend ourselves, commit to things beyond healthy limits, or allow actions which are harmful or unreasonable.  Expressions of approval can reside in how we phrase answers.  Yes, I will help at school by baking brownies AND yes, I respect my limited time by not volunteering for field day.  Yes, you may spend your allowance on another pair of flip flops AND yes, you can wear them any day except for P.E. day.      

My daughter did no harm playing with my calendar.  I could have said yes to her request.  I could have used a variety of synonyms:  all right, okay, sure, yep, yeah.  Yes, we can use some of these today.