Gift

Oh, blessed first Monday of 2014!  This day I DETERMINED to return to my blog after months of not making time.  Monday, despite its negative reputation, is often my favorite day.  It is the day I write (although the school year thwarted my plans in the last months of 2013 as I adjusted to three different school drop off times).  Monday sets my week in motion extending an open palm invitation.  Monday morning’s ambition-filled quiet often feels a gift to me.

Dictionary.com defines gift.
1. something given voluntarily without payment in return, as to show favor toward 
someone, honor an occasion, or make a gesture of assistance; present
2.  the act of giving
3. something bestowed or acquired without any particular effort by the recipient or 
without its being earned
4.  a special ability or capacity; natural endowment; talent

I do not have the entire day on my laurels.  As I sit to write at 8:30am I have already prepared and served breakfast, packed lunches, ferried kids to school and started a load of laundry. I do not suggest a life without work, but one in which an hour of space to sit and be still resides.  There have been times when I felt guilty for stopping my household hurry to sit and write on Monday morning.  Knowing how much exists to be done I sometimes notice an internal voice that tries to tell me I am greedy to take time.  As is often the case with an unkind voice from inside, this is a tape of ideas rooted in undervaluing oneself.  I suspect we all must be wary of that mean voice in our heads.

 

Accepting quiet space to read, nap, write, enjoy music, or meditate is nothing to beat ourselves up about.  We are created to lovingly receive the blessings that arrive into our lives and appreciate them.  Certainly we are not to hoard nor allow ourselves to take so much that our lives become out of balance, but neither should we feel guilty to receive and enjoy something bestowed upon us.  Today, I will also have a hot shower and three meals.  Instead of feeling guilty for not living in poverty or lacking in opportunities, I suggest we feel grateful for abundance.  Deeply, expressively grateful. Not superior but super appreciative in our words and deeds, hearts open and lifted in endless thankfulness.       

 

Having just celebrated holidays of giving and receiving, newly acquired things likely exist in our lives.  The way in which we embrace physical gift exchange is a learning opportunity.  Accepting a gift sometimes feels uneasy especially if you received a present and didn’t have one to offer in return.  Is it possible to simply, graciously feel thankful without guilt?  If we are the giver in the scenario can our gift be voluntarily given without expected recompense?  Can we give to and accept from ourselves and others without judgment? 

 

Accepting today gratefully as a gift is the way I want to start 2014.