Different

I loved the game Sesame Street sang, “One of these things is not like the other, one of these things just doesn’t belong,” during which kid-me selected something that was different.  Comparing and contrasting is important learning.  I’m singing that tune today as I recognize different.

 

The dictionary.com World English Dictionary online entry offers the following for different.
1.  partly or completely unlike
2.  not identical or the same; other
3.  out of the ordinary; unusual

I was in a car wreck two weeks ago.  I respond to queries since, “Parts of my van were all over the road but parts of me were not,” and leave it at that.  How am I different if, most gratefully, not torn physically asunder?  I am acutely angry with breaking of traffic laws, particularly stopping at red lights.  I am a Nervous Nellie at intersections.  Sad without my goal of driving my 2002 van until it reaches 200,000 miles, I drive a 2010 van now and find all the automatic features convenient and daunting.  My devotion to a healthy spine is even greater.

My twelve year old social life was different than life for my daughter.  Technology taunts her into persistent distraction, constant call to be available.  I did homework without the corded telephone that hung in the kitchen vibrating insistently.  Home to home contact was the 1980’s norm when planning something social with friends because they had to call your house from their house.  Not so now.  Entire conversations occur silently, friends to friends in groups, often with no parents involved unless a demanding mom (like me) insists.  I may be different in that I want to talk to an involved adult.

My current house has been my home for ten years.  For the past couple, I make my bed every day.  Before that, I staged a personal coup against bed making.  I felt pressured as a stay-at-home mom to be “just so” and embraced that bit of safe rebellion.  Now the task feels different, offering a sense of togetherness I seriously lacked then.  My bed is neatly tucked and awaiting my return at day’s end as a gift to me, not submission to rules I imposed on myself. 

We can over life’s years in turns become drawn to and driven away from different.  Such a good laugh some of it is!  But like many descriptions of self, descriptions of life viewed without judgment but instead with sensitivity bring balance in the natural flow of change.  Things not identical or the same can occur in ways that feel like steps forward, that expose steps back, or that appreciate steps side to side mimicking dance.

Truth can be stated in a thousand different ways, yet each one can be true.
                                                                                                                - Swami Vivekananda

You can become blind by seeing each day as a similar one.  Each day is a different one, each day brings a miracle of its own.  It’s just a matter of paying attention to this miracle.
                                                                                                - Paulo Coelho

 

 

 

 

 

Affirmation

Writing my blog nourishes and trains me.  The word each week is on my mind, whirling in search of expression and exploration.  Monday musing gets the swirling outside my head and lets me organize it into attention.  A focused, still mind is a wonderful state:  the goal of yoga, the goal of my life.  I recognize thoughts that nourish.  But sometimes the stuff in a moving mind does not offer validity.  Messages may be planted by someone else or rooted in a destructive experience.  Sometimes there are no words at all.  For these moments, I have a strategy.  Notes of affirmation draw positive energy and call to mind what is true.

 

Affirmation is defined at dictionary.com.
1.  The act or an instance of affirming; state of being affirmed.
2.  The assertion that something exists or is true.
3.  Something that is affirmed; a statement or proposition that is declared to be true.
4.  Confirmation or ratification of truth or validity of a prior judgment, decision, etc. 

The world often does not say what is true or strengthening to us.  Occasionally we wait for others to say the things we need to hear.  They might offer affirming statements.  Or we may wait a long, long time that stretches into never.  Don’t wait for the world to tell you what exists or is true.  Tell yourself.  Oprah does.  Dr. Christiane Northrup does.  I learned the habit of affirmation from a creativity coach, Cassie Premo Steele (cassiepremosteele.com), in a fabulous workshop.  What do you know is true that you need to remember?

Seriously, I’m talking actual, physical, written thoughts.  Here are some notes that serve me.  On my closet wall: When I shower and dress in clothes I like, my mood improves.  On my desk:  I know people who can help me get where I want to be.   I am moving toward God in whatever direction I go.  In my bathroom drawer:  Thank you for getting out of bed today.  On the inside of a kitchen cabinet:  When I eat natural, healthy foods I feel full, nourished and free of unresolved cravings. 

Gather supplies.  I like practical post-it notes.  Maybe note cards or pretty stationary saved for just the right use.  A pen or pencil or grape scented marker.  Phrases cut out of magazines can be wonderful.  Make a board to display somewhere with many messages or place single affirmations in places in your environment where YOU WILL SEE THEM.  Create a recurring reminder message on your phone.  Read each affirmation word for word every time you see it.  Every time.   

If no affirming sentence comes to mind, sit in quiet or be attentive to your daily thoughts until an affirmation flows naturally from a situation.  Maybe borrow these:    

When I say YES to myself and my needs, my energy always increases and I feel wonderful. 
                                                                                      - Dr. Christiane Northrup

I am responsible for my life and I do my best at this moment.
                                                                                      - Oprah Winfrey

 

New

Welcome 2013!  Resolution conversations exalt ways to improve.  I shout, “Amen!” to self-benefiting behaviors.   But, something powerful and potentially deceptive resides in these first days of the year.  Subject lines in abundant junk email propose a treasure-trove of potentials.  Melt your fat!  Meet your mate!  Lower your bills!  Ads assert a “new you” via sale priced clothing or a weight loss center.  I propose instead of NEW You, there is TRUE You.

New is defined at dictionary.com.
1.  of recent origin, production, purchase, etc.; having but lately come or been brought into being.
2.  of a kind now existing or appearing for the first time.
3.  having but lately or but now come into knowledge.
4.  unfamiliar or strange.
5.  having but lately come to a place, position, status, etc.

New habits?  Yes. 

New intentions?  Absolutely. 

New knowledge?  Sure. 

New jeans, furniture, plans, or job ?  Affirmative. 

New YOU existing or appearing for the first time?  No. 

More precisely I think there is a True You.  True You is present, eternal, good, deserving of kindness, abundance, respect and love.  True You, created in the divine image and likeness of the Creator, yearns to be realized.  True You may indeed reside under unhealthy weight or abusive habits or draped in work you don’t like or suffering in addiction (doesn’t have to be illegal to be addictive - TV, food, alcohol, cigarettes).   These discordances are addressed by bringing our bodies into balance not to be media imposed perfect but to be True You.  Strong.  Courageous.  Beautiful.     

 

Resolving toward True You cannot disillusion nor dissatisfy.   Yearning to be a different being can leave a person feeling lost and disappointed.  Expecting an all new self can be a falsehood that distracts from truth (see post 2/27/12).  Old me does not disappear into thin air replaced with a different creature.  Accumulated experiences up to today are real but passed.  People can step upon a different path that doesn’t deny days gone by but instead releases them from having any power.  We can change.  

 

This work is neither new nor easy.  It comes at varying times baptized with tears, laced with laughter, blessed with rest, strung with struggle but always with what is real.  Feel sad, but don’t stay sad.  Be proud of success but don’t cling to pride.  Experience anger, but don’t hold onto anger.  Be honest.  If you feel depressed acknowledge depression but don’t let depression stay.   Cry.  Forgive.  Dance.  Sleep.  Exercise.  Question.  Meditate.  Try.  Try again.

 

We can read books or join groups to find cohorts and supporters.  The True You journey is individual but embraces the gift of help.  One contemporary wise man and one ancient can be today’s companions with their words:

You don’t need another diet, workout manual, or personal trainer. 
Go within, listen to your body, and treat it with the dignity and love
that your self-respect demands. 
                                                             – Dr. Wayne W. Dyer (The Power of Intention)

And you, when will you begin this journey into yourself?
                                                                                – Rumi