Afraid

I recently supported Cassie Premo Steele’s Facebook co-created poetry Kickstarter (http://www.kickstarter.com/projects/747692735/co-create-the-wordy-wednesday-poem-book?ref=live).  As a result I was entered into a drawing and subsequently won a copy of Sheryl Sandberg’s new book Lean In.  I’d pIanned to read it in one weekend flurry over Easter break but spent that time fighting fever and skipping coloring eggs instead.  The week off school that followed was filled with health recoup and kid time.  Today I am a measly 26 pages into the book.  Nonetheless I have arrived at something to contemplate:  a poster described as present in the Facebook office where Sandberg works that reads “What would you do if you weren’t afraid?”

 

Afraid is defined at dictionary.com.
1.  feeling fear; filled with apprehension:  afraid to go.
2.  feeling regret, unhappiness, or the like:  I’m afraid we can’t go on Monday.
3.  feeling reluctance, unwillingness, distaste, or the like:  He seemed afraid to show his children kindness.

 

Sheryl shares on p.26 of Lean In that “Writing this book is what I would do if I weren’t afraid.”  This strikes me as a great example of how reading over and over a written statement intentionally placed in your path affects your actions. 

 

I am afraid of the question!   Afraid of the answers.  Believing a small bit of fear might just keep us safe, as in not stepping too close to a cliff or driving a car recklessly.  But I equally hold true that fear can keep us so far from the cliff we miss the view or never learn to drive at all.

 

What are we afraid of?  Being judged by others as odd or a failure or underachieving or bossy or foolish?  Of being without enough money to live comfortable?  Of alienating someone?  Of revealing our truth?  Of hurting someone’s feelings?  Of regret?  Of screwing up?  Of rocking a basically steady boat that is, well, okay if not fabulous?  We’re afraid of the unknown, but isn’t it ALL unknown?

 

What would I do if I weren’t afraid?  I don’t seem to have a clear answer today.  For starters, I’m going to read the question every day, “What would you do if you weren’t afraid?”  That does scare me a bit because, perhaps as in Sandberg’s daily exposure to written query, I might come across a specific task, a spark, an idea.  As I ponder I must also wonder though what practices can we conquer our fears?  Faith.  Meditation.  Daily experience.  Absorbing inspiring works of scripture, poetry, non-fiction, and biography.  Seeking wise leaders and listening.  Listening.

 

                                                I learned that courage was not the absence
                                                of fear, but the triumph over it.  The brave
                                                man is not he who does not feel afraid, but
                                                he who conquers that fear.
                                                                                                - Nelson Mandela

 

                                                We can easily forgive a child who is afraid
                                                of the dark; the real tragedy of life is when
                                                mean are afraid of the light.
                                                                                                - Plato